What Dreams May Come

Last night, I slept at around 1 AM est. It was perhaps a normal sleep time for me. I had a good weekend spent here with my office friends, it was quite a short weekend, so many activities to do and of course this is also tiring in a way.

I slept deeply and dreamt so clearly about some vivid pictures in my subconscious mind. There were two significant points in that dream that I remember:

A good old friend in my dream.

A pregnant friend whom I have not seen for the longest time. I went ahead and research for the meaning of this particular dream. It taunted me to search for the meaning because the scene was peculiar enough. The friend that I am referring to here as pregnant is a "he". And that he is gay after all these years that we've become friends I never knew until now. That is the premise of the dream. In the dream, it was a sudden reunion with him (and his BF) when we meet on a mountain climbing trip. The scene between me and my old friend is so clear. In the dream, I can certainly say that I am surprised. It even shock me when I learned that he's pregnant. I even utterred, "Imposibleng buntis siya, eh lalake yan eh."

The dream of a friend, an old good friend, being pregnant, being gay is a unique thing to dream. I went on to the dream interpreter website to see what kind of meaning this thing is trying to convey to me.

Interpretation:

To see your childhood friend in your dream, signifies regression into your past where you had no responsibilities and things were much simpler and carefree. You may be wanting to escape the the pressures and stresses of adulthood. Consider the relationship you had with this friend and the lessons that were learned.

Second Dream: I am cutting my fingernails.

My second dream pictured myself cutting fingernails. I am just surprise that even this so specific act of cutting fingernails can be so prominent in my dream.

Interpretation:

Suggests that you are trying to avoid some situation or trying to get out of a responsibility.

Facets of a Smile

Sometimes. even if we are dissolved in worries or bad thoughts. The only best thing to do is just smile. It's one of life's toughest lesson to learn. Think about it.

Living the life

My Key West trip put me in a perspective where I am able to think of the weary worries that I have been fighting ever since I came to know and understand the situation.




I paused for a while on this Key West trip where I took pictures from my new Nikon D40 dSLR which made my catch of life even more vibrant and truly breathtaking.

Living the life is the thought that I had when I was there in Key West. Truly remarkable trip, had fun, enjoyed the beach, the not so crowded but lively streets of Duval and Simonton along with many other Key West street landmarks.

Rhapsody

What is this ecstasy that I feel right now

Inspired by a film that never got wrong

In my obscurity I found solemn

This rhapsody of feeling I enjoy

It’s true that I feel dejected

Nonetheless in this spur of the moment

I felt high and momentous

This rhapsody I hope to enjoy longer and more

Everybody's Changing by Keane

Not really the perfect song to describe my thoughts and concerns laterly. But certainly, I encountered change that is probably the most notable turn in my endless drive in life.You say you wander your own land But when I think about it I don't see how you can You're aching, you're breaking And I can see the pain in your eyes Since everybody's changing And I don't know why. So little time Try to understand that I'm Trying to make a move just to stay in the game I try to stay awake and remember my name But everybody's changing And I don't feel the same. You're gone from here Soon you will disappear Fading into beautiful light 'cause everybody's changing And I don't feel right. So little time Try to understand that I'm Trying to make a move just to stay in the game I try to stay awake and remember my name But everybody's changing And I don't feel the same. So little time Try to understand that I'm Trying to make a move just to stay in the game I try to stay awake and remember my name But everybody's changing And I don't feel the same. Ooo... Everybody's changing And I don't feel the same.

Calming

In this hour, I call upon the light to calm my senses. I ask the Highest power to bring me some direction of senseful track.

It will be days ago, when I learn to love life better. It was days ago when I feared the most. The greatest fear and the greatest lost any one can probably experience and try to overcome. Somebody told me to be strong, with this someone I felt some sense of direction. I was right to spill somehow a bit of my self right now. Just at least to unload some burden I have to endure probably until the end.

I call upon the Migthiest to give me more power, to be stronger, to be more calm facing the storm. I ask for healing, I call upon the Universe to conspire and make full sense of my evolution.

I won't know how many days ahead I'll be facing. What I know now, I am trying to be calm, learning to chew this hard rock, and trying to find the best possible solution I can get.

It's gonna be tough ride. Like more than any wild ride in the world can ever level to this. Nonetheless, as I probably have told once in my previous entries, I will live to see the day to seize and hopefully make a difference in making some reality give a good bite!

Credits: Thanks to photoblog.com for the photo. Thanks to you (you know who you are).

CDSTTW

What worst can happen now!? Right now when am feeling down, sorry and about to cry. I wish I can tell you how I feel and you can comfort along the way.

There's no amount of love right now can fill my drought and my battered spirit. I can only be stronger now and try to live each day happy, and free spirited.

So many things are flashing back to me like a rewind and yet I am still here, just me, on this seat, in front of my computer, staring at the screen, blank, just typing the words that means a lot. So much hidden feelings of surprise, shock and thoughts of fear and worries lingering.

I just want to go to the top of the mountain, shout, cry, embrace the land for which I will return in time. I just want to make myself go around, busy, and busy to the point I can forget about the things that just came around.

No amount of ice cream, cakes, good food can fill the void now. I need to find my compass and find my way right.

Confuse. Disoriented. Sad. Thinking. Thinking deeply. What ever happen to me?!

I didn't know the feeling until now. !#!$!%!!$$%!@#$!~~#$!#!#$%&&*(%%^&*$

Sailing On

Like a comet that passes by each time in the sky, I came to know how much life can surprise any one. It’s always a refreshing thought to think about how dynamic life can be and how robust destiny can be inevitable.

At some point in everyone’s life, we could say that none of us did plan perfectly well for things to happen. I remember some good friends of mine that had some life changing situations in the past. Some got married, some went abroad for better careers, some stayed on to manage their own business, some continued to live, some continued to aspire. Most of us did start to aspire and become somebody. Most of us did look at the future with a goal. Many of us did some deep thinking and analysis to see where we can go as we age and learn with wisdom.

I write again, just trying to reflect these changes. And while also looking at the best changes I’ve come to witness in my life I want to think of the good things and how it can inspire me to do better in spite of some recent concerns I have.

In the coming weeks, I’ll probably look and ask myself, “How are you doing?” There has been a significant concern on my part that’s bugging me. I am not ready to talk more about it but I am quite concern on the end part f this probably life changing event. In the next few months, I can speak more freely about this but for now I just like to reflect on what destiny is trying to tell me. What is the reason? What do I need to do? All these “WHAT” questions in my mind right now. Indeed, life can be surprising I tell you.

I am delighted as I sail that some friends are also sailing on to a new chapter. It’s really funny to remember how once we dream and told ourselves that we will stick together if all of our plans don’t fit the direction that we want. But now, it seems that each of us going to be explorer BIG TIME! This is quite refreshing to note. One thing is sure though, we continue to stick together and update each other. Life can be surprising indeed.

My life, my family’s life, my brother’s and sister’s life are all integrated in one common inspiration of success and achievement. This fueled us all to think further with our lives. We may have stumbled once or twice or even more than that but we sailed on. Some of us sailed away farther and while others keep their dock offshore and find their change in there.

I will be changing soon. In fact, I think I’ve changed a bit now. Just looking at some things differently now. Maybe after this confirmation, I will transcend higher. I’ve come full circle with my self and realized a lot of things. As I drive each day, I find myself asking, thinking, analyzing how can I make my change something more meaningful. I feel stressed about this and certainly leading me to just stare in blank. I just want to know what more can I do and hopefully once confirming what I am now comprise then I can sail on steadily once more. We can’t always have a rocky sailing experience, it’s not good. It’s better to just sail on steadily and experience minor wave fronts along the way.

To Him, hear my heart’s desire!

Sweet goodbye for now

Saying goodbye is never an easy thing. I think this statement is true at some point. But my "goodbye for now" was made even warmer and sweeter by good friends Credits to Enzo for the ULTRA RED photo frame.

And then Mopey & Broody's goodbye is even fun and cute in their own way. Broody's "paawa" face and Mopey's wash away style!

Live or Die - excerpts from my time

In this crazy world

Live or die

In this cruel life

Live or die

I came to know

That life is not easy

Live or die

I came to see

That my life is short

Live or die

Live or die

I told myself

Life is short

But I choose to live

I will

Time will come

My spirit shall pass

To all my love

I shall perish with one last laugh

Until that time comes

I choose to live

With all my self

With my life intact

I shall live

My Heart Will Go On

So Rudy Fernandez passed away last June 7. Thanks to my office friend Inzo who like me is a Pepster! He learned about it in PEP - Philippine Entertainment Portal.

I just browsed through Youtube and chose Yuna Ito's version of My Heart Will Go On to bring an Asian twist, perhaps a much personal touch or tribute to Daboy! Let's face it, I am a fan!

Another Chapter starts now!

June 1, 2008 - Narita airport, NRT, Japan 2:10 PM Japanese Time
I arrived in one piece after like almost 4 hours of airplane travel. WHOA! I was asleep most of the time during that flight, quite tired. I was looking at the clouds and thinking about this new chapter once again. A new lease of good opportunity in terms of my career, and of course this will affect other aspect of my life in general.

9 months had passed by since I returned from the US. After that experience, I did hope to come back and I did thought it won't happen due to earlier information. Nonetheless, the opportunity came and here I am facing another chapter in my life.

Second birthday abroad
I'll be celebrating my 29th year abroad. Last year I celebrated my 28th year in Arizona. When I was younger I did thought of celebrating my birthday in a different setting which I think already happened. Thanks to my forecasting of the future! hehe

Leaving "Tatay"
I'd like to think these onshore opportunities that came to me over the last two years isn't something that is keeping my tatay and I to move closer together. Indeed, in reality, it's hard to leave someone you hold dear in your heart. Especially when it's just the two of you counting on each other in these world. This time I intend to bring him with me. I just hope his passport application can push as plan and then his US visa can follow. If not, I will definitely make it happen that he and I spend sometime soon again;

Loveless
They say if you have good career, you don't have a lovelife. For me, I think I had some share of sweet relationship over the past months. However, time isn't so right. I don't want to say good bye to anyone. And never I did. But now, that this reality is biting, I can just hope soon Mr D or Mr J can still continue to muse me, make me happy, and you know.. love me.


Change is indeed the only constant thing in this world. Beginning another chapter, I just hope to fulfill more plans. I am thankful to the Almighty for granting me all the blessings and of course the challenges where I learned some wisdom,. I am delighted and humbled.

Coming soon in the nearest multiply account near you - JT's flashy Florida experience!

Acknowledgements
Thanks for those who came to my small send off party, quick coffee catch up moments. Thanks for those who helped me go to the airport. Thanks for those accompanied me to ship my other stuffs in Bulacan. Thanks to our company HR for helping me process my clearances. Thanks to my company leads for guiding me. Thanks for those people that I met in the past 9 months. Thanks for everything. I never forget. I'm always thankful looking back.

The Condo Fever

Last weekend in Baguio, I saw the movie Condo. It was an indie film that was done in a very puzzling way! I guess the writer really tried to ignite my analytical senses when watching the story unfold before my eyes! Anyways, this movie somehow probably triggered a long conversation between a young friend and myself, especially because we got so trapped in the puzzles of the movie that we just saw.

The conversation unfolds –

I would be writing about this if not because of something that happened today, Monday. I was chatting with Den, a good friend, probably special enough for me. Someone I thought I could spend my life and my time but perhaps it was all too early to assume. Anyways, my train of thought just led me to think about what my young friend and I were talking about in that cold middle of the night while his boyfriend was sleeping between us.

The question is –

“Bakit nga ba hanggang ngayon wala pa..” or something to that effect

I immediately pause and thought about it. My answer was simply “Wala pa eh, may kulang pa sa kanila,” - or something to that effect.

For me, having a partner right now is not a priority but certainly it’s something that I want and hope to have. It’s not a luxury or even a necessity but I do know within myself that I want to have someone with me, to share my joys, laughter and pains. But to this point in time, that person hasn’t really express himself to me. Maybe he is there but then again maybe not. I just grew tired of thinking about it I guess.

That cold night, led my young friend and I to talk about the complexities of getting into a relationship and for that matter the most peculiar relationship any human being could get into. The setting was right, the timing was perfect which made us talk all throughout the night. It was a healthy conversation, it was a refreshing exchange of views. It was a mental sex about love, relationship, beliefs and ideas! I learned some new views and hopefully my friend also learned something from me. It was like a shrink to patient session and vice versa. It was a mutual conversation which got ignited by Condo – the movie.

Conclusion of conversation –

I couldn’t clearly remember the night and how it ended. I know we said “Good night” at the end of our conversation. Aside from that, we lurked on some points such as never surrendering to the disbelief in love, always think of what might be or what could have been, think of what good could possibly happen if you risk this or do that, think of what the other person can do for you to make you laugh or make you cry.

Thanks to the movie, Condo – we may have not find what we’re looking for but we did try to analyze some thoughts and hopefully find our truth or find what we seem to lose or not find.

Life is exciting - grabe!

A track of my days ...

Some weeks ago - Got a word about possible onshore work assignment (Almost thought this would be next year na!)

May 5 - Received an official news I will be going onshore.

Week of May 9 - With all these upcoming onshore assignment, my world went a bit crazy with all the personal items I need to check and settle.

Between May 5 - 9 - sent follow up emails to JM and Pilar to get some receivables. Exchange of sms, texts and IMs just to settle. I need to get this going to add to some of my financial collections. Need more money these days due to some trips and some personal emergencies at home.

May 9 - FAB 4 Manila Get Together. After Pinky and I invaded Malaysia with Excell, now we invade Shangri-la Mall again for a catch up party with soon to be mom Shindie!!! Yey!
It seems like Shangrila is a an official FAB 4 place for meet ups!

May 10 - Going to Sta Rosa, Laguna to check an investment property which I will get soon! Then off to Bulacan to accompany tatay (he is sick and I just learned about it tonight, he's getting well though).

May 11 - Makati. Seeing my friend Dennis. Dennis Dennis Dennis.. hay..

May 12 - Annual Med Exam.

Week of May 16 - Work, Onshore clearances follow,

May 14 - Need to send some personal stuffs back in Bulacan.

May 15 - Am expecting to get JM and Pilar's payment.

May 15 - Dinner meeting with Pilar.

May 16 - 18 - Baguio outing. Are we ready ate?

May 19 - 23 - Hope to complete my GCP preps, my ASLA closure, settle more of my personal items and prepare for a dinner with friends.

May 24 -26 - Hope to spend days with tatay before I leave

May 27 - Rest day I hope

May 28 - 30 - Short trip to Boracay

May 31 - Last minute preparations

June 1 - Hello America again!

June 2 onwards - USA life once again... all the best in this exciting life! So much to celebrate.

I'll be your light

It's 9:19 AM Manila Time. I seat in front of my personal laptop thinking, excited, looking forward and basically happy. Although I am tired from a long and stressfulday at work (midshift), I found myself in hype. Is it because I just came from a very stressful work meetings, project calls and updates round the clock? Or is it because of other latest "chika" in my life, some buzz, some positive winds blowing. I'm loving this feeling! I feel good.

As I walk home from the office, I put on my ipod and tuned in to my upbeat music to keep my long walk a fun-filled experience. Imagine me walking, singing, and stomping my feet to the music as I venture into the side streets of Ayala Avenue, illegally jaywalking at Paseo De Roxas and musing the small streets of Alfaro, Leviste, Sanchez etc etc etc.

One music that caught my attention is one my of club sound favorite - "I'll be your light". You know what!? This song has a heart, has a sense and full of soul. I can't help but think of someone I know when I was listening to the music. This is the only time where I was able to carefully listen to the lyrics of this song. It's a winner!

Here
I want you closer
Don't ever let go
I need you to know that I'm here
Don't worry
No sir, you won't see me run
'Cause I'm far from done
I'm gonna give you all the lovin' your heart needs
When you're standing on the edge I'll reach out so you can see

And I'll be your light
I'm shining in the darkest night
I'll take you to a higher place burnin' so bright
I'll be the song that moves you when all hope is gone
I'll give you strength to carry on
I'm burnin' so bright
I'll be your light

I'll be your light (repeat)

Yes
If the clouds come to cover your sky
Just know that I will stand by
I'll be there
Yes through the hardest of times
Just seek and you will find
That when the world turns cold and almost gray
I can be the one to hold you and show you the way

And I'll be your light
I'm shining in the darkest night
I'll take you to a higher place burnin' so bright
I'll be the song that moves you when all hope is gone
That gives you the strength to carry on
I'm burnin' so bright
I'll be your light

Burnin' bright
Burnin' bright
Burnin' bright

Burnin' bright so you'll see
I can be who you need
Give you faith to believe

And I'll be your light
I'm shining in the darkest night
I'll take you to a higher place burnin' so bright
I'll be the song that moves you when all hope is gone
Gives you strength to carry on
Burnin so bright
I'll be your light

I'll be the light
Gives you strength to carry on
Burnin' so bright

Lyrics Source: Lyrics Time

SERYENG TAGALOG: Sa haba ng paglalakbay

(Sanaysay na hatid ukol sa aking pamamasyal sa Hilagang Luzon bayan ng Pilipinas) Natapos ko na ang isang paglalakbay na matagal ko ng inaasam na mangyari. Naging maluwat, masaya at talagang kaaya-aya ang naging pasyal ko sa hilagang lalawigan ng Ilocos sa bayan ng matanawing Pilipinas. Sa haba ng paglalakbay namin patungo sa aming destinasyon, nadaanan naming ang marami pang bayan sa Gitnang Luzon. Sa kagaya kong halos lumaki sa siyudad, ang makakita ng matanawing lalawigan sa kabilang banda ay isang napakalaking pagkakataon para maisip ko kung gaano kaganda itong Pilipinas. Sa haba ng paglalakbay nagkaroon ako ng pagkakataon na magpahinga muli at kalimutan ang mga iba ko pang iniisip. Binigyan din ako ng tamang panahon para muli maging tunay ang aking mga ngiti at halakhak sa piling ng mga bagong kakilala at kaibigan. Sa haba ng paglalakbay ko, naalala ko ang mga taong iniwan ko at sana ay kapiling ko na tumatawa, nagbubulungan, nagtsitsismisan habang nasa bus, naglalakad sa kalye ng Crisologo sa Vigan, tumatakbo sa dalampasigan ng Pagudpud at sumisigaw sa bangka dahil sa labis bilis ng takbo nito habang kami ay papalapit sa tinatawag na “Blue Lagoon”. Naalala ko silang lahat dahil sa mga naging paglalakbay ko, wala pa ata akong mahal sa buhay ko na nakasama ko, palagi na lang kung sa madalas ay mag-isa akong humaharap sa bagong mundo at kadalasan ay mga bagong kakilala ang nakakasama ko. Naisip ko sana sa susunod ay may pagkakataong silang mga matagal ko ng kasama, kapamilya at kaibigan ang makasama ko sa aking paglalakbay. Sa haba ng paglalakbay ko, ang bawat tore ng kampanaryo sa Vigan, Laoag, Paoay, Sarrat ay nagpaalala sa akin kung gaano kataas ang aking pangarap. At gaya ng mga nagtataasang tore, sa hinaba-haba ng panahon ang mga pangarap ko ay mananatiling matibay at patuloy kong susungkitin hanggang matamo ko ang kaligayahang hatid ng mga wagas na pangarap na ito. Sa haba ng paglalakbay ko ang bawat taong nakilala ko ay nagpaalala sa akin kung gaano kahalaga ang buhay sa ating lahat. At ang bawat buhay na iyong mamahalin, bibigyang halaga ay sadyang kasama sa iyong kabuuan. Sa paglalakbay kong ito, kung may mga buhay akong pinahahalagahan at inaalala iyon ay ang mga tao gaya ng aking ama, at ang iba pang malapit ngayon sa aking puso. Sa haba ng paglalakbay na ito, nagbigay ito ng hindi mapapantayang aktwalisasyon sa aking sarili kung ano ang gusto kong mangyari sa mga susunod ko pang hakbangin sa buhay. Gusto ko ng buhay na simple pero sapat ang katuwaan, katiwasayan at umaapaw sa masaganang pagpapala mula sa Kanya. Salamat sa Kanya, sa paglalakbay kong ito na Kanyang pinahintulutan na mangyari sa akin. Sa dulo ng paglalakbay na ito, nagkaroon ako kahit paano ng bagong pokus sa mga tatahakin ko pang gawain. Ang mga larawang kuha sa paglalakbay na ito ang magsisilbing matibay kong alaala upang bigyan ako ng kakaibang inspirasyon at sigla sa haba ng paglalakbay. Sa bawat pagkakataong ako ay malulumbay maiisip ko ang paglalakbay na ito kung saan maraming bunga ng alaala ang magbibigay sa akin ng buhay na kulay at lakas ng kasiyahan na hatid ng pasikot-sikot pero pawing magagandang pagliko na aking nasumpungan sa haba ng paglalakbay.

How will I know

I have been asking myself everytime if I see some potential - how will i know, how will i know. The issue is quite simple. I have known what I want. But it seems like knowing it won't just suffice to the achievement of that ultimate goal. There are factors that sometimes affect me and the other party.

I accidentally click the itunes which played How will I know song of Whitney Houston. It caught my attention. Hay! This song kick off my day!

MAGMAMAHALAN TAYO, HANGGANG SA DULO NG WALANG HANGGAN

"Magmamahalan tayo, hanggang sa dulo ng walang hanggan," ang sabi ni Lena sa kanyang mga huling sandali sa nalalabing araw ng Maging Sino Ka Man Book 2.

Kudos to the Book 2 cast of this stylish teleserye from the Kapamilya team. I just can't let this opportunity to pass by and not review and put my at least a cent of my thoughts for this tv series.

Love surpassing all the odds in life is the basic story line of this series. This is what life is all about. Love is always a defining factor in every aspect of life. Maging sino ka man, truly a tv series to love and remember. Can't wait for the Book 3 to start playing!

SERYENG TAGALOG: Sa kamay ni Hesus sa ilalim ng araw sa lalawigan ng Laguna, Quezon at Bulacan

Umaga pa lang ng Huwebes ay tumulak na kami ni tatay patungong Laguna kung saan kami magmumula patungong Quezon. Ang aming ruta patungong Laguna ay sadyang mabilisan, wala pa akong tulog galing sa trabaho ko. Pagdating namin sa bahay ng aking Auntie sa Laguna ay nag-almusal lang kami pagkatapos ay naghanda na ang buong pamilya namin para sa paglalakbay patungong Lucban, Quezon.

Pinuntahan namin sa Lucban ang grotto ng "Kamay ni Hesus Healing Grotto" kung saan sikat ang mahigit 300 hakbang paakyat ng bundok. Sa itaas ng bundok ay ang istatwa ni Hesus na dinadayo ng mga tao lalo 'pag panahon ng Kuwaresma.

Mahaba, matagal at nakakapagod ang byahe patungong Lucban. Medyo kasagsagan ng mga nagsisiuwian dahil sa mahabang bakasyon. Kaya sinuong namin ang mahabang trapiko sa SLEX at sa Maharlika Highway. Dinaanan namin ang lalawigan ng Batangas at ang mga bayan nito bago namin narating ang teritoryo ng Quezon.

Si tatay ay tubong Quezon. Siya ay ipinanganak sa Atimonan, Quezon. Mahalaga kahit paano sa kanya ang biyaheng ito. Matagal na siyang di nakakarating ng Quezon. Ang huling pagdalaw namin sa Quezon ay nung 9 taong gulang pa lang yata ako. Simula noon ay hinde na kami nakabalik lalo pa't nagkasakit na si nanay nung 10 taon ako.

Kitang-kita ko sa tatay ko ang kasabikan na makita ang Quezon. Kahit pa sabihin na sa Lucban lang kami pupunta ay nararamdaman ko na masaya siyang makita ang kanyang lalawigan. Sabik siya na makita ang mga naging pagbabago sa kanyang lalawigan.

Ako man ay nasabik din. Habang nasa biyahe kami hinde ko maiwasan alalahanin ang aking maikling at malabong memorya tungkol sa una kong pagpunta sa Quezon noong araw. Nakita ko ngayon na maganda ang Quezon. Malawak din ito at sadyang progresibo din ang mga bayan. Naisip ko, ano na nga din kaya ang hitsura ng Atimonan kung ang mga kalapit bayan nito ay nagbago din naman. Sana sa susunod ay makauwi kami ng Atimonan.

Naratinmg namin ang Lucban, mga pasado ala-una ng hapon. Maraming deboto ang nasa grotto. May mga seryosong deboto, ang iba ay usyosero lamang, maging ang iba ay turista lamang.

Sa paglalakbay naming ito, kahit pagod ako at walang tulog ay di ko naramdaman na pagod ako. Siguro dahil sa kasabikan kong mag out of town ay malakas ang adrenaline ko. Bukod pa doon, naisip kong binasbasan ako ng Diyos ng sobra sobrang lakas noong Huwebes para kayanin ko ang biyahe namin.

Pagkatapos naming magdasal sa grotto ay ang inaabangang kainan sa palaisdaan. Ang palaisdaan ang isa sa mga restoran na sikat sa Lucban. Natagalan kami sa pagkain sa bagal ng serbisyo at sa dami na din ng taong kumakain ay kulang ang tauhan nila para mapagsilbihan ang lahat. Sa bandang huli ay nagpapasalamat kami sa Diyos sa biyayang inihain niya sa amin.

Ginabi na kami ng makabalik sa Laguna. Doon na kami nagpalipas ng gabi bago kami bumalik ng Bulacan. Salamat sa pagkakataong nadalaw namin ang isang kakaibang grotto sa Katimugang Tagalog. May grotto din sa Bulacan ang sikat na Lourdes Grotto at Divine Mercy grotto. Dinarayo din ito ng maraming tao hinde lang sa Mahal na Araw kundi sa bawat Linggo at araw ng buhay.

Tunay ngang kasiya-siya at mabunga ang araw ng Huwebes santo ko kasama ng pamilya ko. Bukod sa pamilya ay ang pagkakataong nakapag-isip din ako para sa sarili ko. Salamat sa Diyos!

SERYENG TAGALOG: Sa nakaraang isang buwan

Sa muling pagkakataon naisipan kong buhayin ang seryeng Tagalog ko sa "blog". Ginawa ko na ito dati pa sa unang blogsite ko at ngayon nga ay aking susubukang gawin muli dito.

Sa loob ng isang buwan matapos ang araw ng mga puso, naging abala ako sa trabaho. Bukod doon ay ang aking nakasanayan ng gawain na pumunta ng gym para makapaglabas ng stress at kasabay na nito ang pagpapaganda sa aking katawan at mapanatili kong maayos ito kahit di naman talaga pumuputok sa muscle ang katawan ko.

Kaalinsabay ng trabaho at gym ang pagpaplano ko sana na mag out of town noong Feb 29-Mar 3. Hinde natuloy ang tangkang pagpunta ko sa Boracay kasama si Gerard na kaopisina ko. Maraming mga balakid sa plano na ang pinakahinatnan ay ang pagtunaw ng plano kaya di kami natuloy. Siyempre nauwi sa back up plan na mag-Batangas na lang din. Pero ito man ay hinde umusad.

Nakuntento ang sarili ko sa pagpirmi sa aking condo. Bukod doon ay nagpunta ako sa isa sa mga kilalang Chinese Astrologer na si Master Chao at nagkaroon ako ng pagkakataon na makita ko ang aking kapalaran gamit ang lumang sistema ng astrolohiya ng mga Tsino. Gayon din naman, ako ay nagpunta sa Spa para magamit ko ang nabili kong Spa package. Naisip ko okey na din naman na 'di ako natuloy sa Boracay at Batangas. Marami din akong nagawa dito sa loob ng limang araw na bakasyon kong iyon.

Sa loob ng isang buwan, nagkaroon ako ng oras para manuod ng pelikula nila Maria at Dingdong, Toni at Sam at ng kung ano ano pang pelikula na lumabas sa sine at sa dvd. Nagtangka akong gumawa ng review noong nakaraang 2 linggo pero nagloloko itong multiply blog ko at 'di nailathala dito sa online ang review ko. Sayang! Tanda ko pa, inis na inis ako nung hinde na-save yong sinulat ko. Tang ina!

Sweet valentine gifts

1 long stemmed rose and 1 sweet classic confection of chocolate cake on Valentines Day just for me. I find this very sweet. It's been a while when someone took time to give me something like this.

I can't say much. I just wanna savour this feeling. It's different! :)

A Valentine Treat

What Jonathan Tierra means?

table width=350 align=center border=0 cellspacing=0 cellpadding=2> What Jonathan Tierra Means You are fair, honest, and logical. You are a natural leader, and people respect you.
You never give up, and you will succeed... even if it takes you a hundred tries.
You are rational enough to see every part of a problem. You are great at giving other people advice.

You are well rounded, with a complete perspective on life.
You are solid and dependable. You are loyal, and people can count on you.
At times, you can be a bit too serious. You tend to put too much pressure on yourself.

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.
You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.
You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.
You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.
You have the classic "Type A" personality.

You are a seeker. You often find yourself restless - and you have a lot of questions about life.
You tend to travel often, to fairly random locations. You're most comfortable when you're far away from home.
You are quite passionate and easily tempted. Your impulses sometimes get you into trouble.

You are truly an original person. You have amazing ideas, and the power to carry them out.
Success comes rather easily for you... especially in business and academia.
Some people find you to be selfish and a bit overbearing. You're a strong person.







You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.
You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.
You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.

You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.
You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.
At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.

You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You're always up to something.
You have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle you. You're very intense.
You definitely are a handful, and you're likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

A tale of two scorpions - JMB and LS

It's almost 6 AM, I just have to write it down. It is really a bliss to be back in the dating circuit. For a change, there's one good thing about dating. I feel young and hopeful that something so good could really last.

"JMB"

I met up with JMB yesterday around 7 PM to have dinner and movie and chat. It was quite a big deal for me in a way. JMB knows why, I already shared what my thoughts are. Let us say, I've admired JMB for quite sometime but time wasn't so right then and I didn't really entertain the possibility of getting together. Now we have a chance but I also don't like to rush things. I have been honest to JMB that I like to look into this possibility and yes we can go on a second date. For now, that's where I stand.

JMB, astrologically speaking is a Scorpion (Western) and I think Snake year (Chinese). Looking at my astro-match, the signs of JMB isn't not so fitting. I read though that it is a successful match with full of hard work and perseverance to make it work. But this is astro-compatibility. I just like to amuse myself what the good old stars of the universe has to say. In the end, it's gonna be me who will decide.

So, I'll see where this union would lead.

"LS"

Let me call this next person as LS. LS is not your ordinary meet up date. LS is more of a planned meet up session. It's like more of a business meeting yesterday.

LS is like most of the person I've met and had a chance to share some moments with. At first I felt uncertain & disbelieving about what are the chances of meeting a person you thought real is not real at all. Anyways, that's beside the point now.

My meet up with LS tend to push me into thinking through about how I really perceive the person. LS is a hard shell to break. LS is not your typical open book. There seems to be some void and unwelcomed notion in the mind of this person. LS had enamoured some fresh interests but still I can't really believe everything LS has to say. LS sounded quite real, fun, sincere and hearing some of LS' stories makes me think I like the person. My question now is, will LS find me fit for the package. Perhaps I should have already known the answer -- it's just business. I wish we could know more about each other

LS is also a Scorpion (Western) and born on the year of th Pig (Chinese). So the stars says the same for LS. However, note that LS is a pig which makes LS a perfect ally for me.

I wonder, at least the best thing that could happen is gain some more friends in this process if not a lover to hold for a lifetime.

So much for these. Good night!

Brothers touchpoint

"In the Word brother signifies the same as neighbor, for the reason that every one ought to love his neighbor as himself; thus brethren were so called from love; or what is the same, from good. " Source: http://biblemeanings.info/Words/Family/Brother.htm

I am an only child, so to me having some sibling be it a brother or sister was something I didn't have to really hope having. Nonetheless, in my life I've come across a lot of people some of which remained like a brother to me or sister for that matter.

This weekend was no ordinary weekend for me, it's a get together not only with equally talented, intelligent, loving brothers but a weekend to keep in my memory. It's not always a usual union since most of us had separated ways, worked abroad, lived distantly and crossed some other circle of friends. So this one is extra special in a way. We missed a lot of happenings but this touchpoint today made a big difference in catching up.

Indeed, like the Word said we developed from simple act of "good" nature which eventually led us all guys to treat like blood brothers though we're not. For me, it's a big deal since I don't have siblings they are my brothers. I regard them as one. It's been one heck of a ride for all of us, the happiness, the blessings that we all share. The commonalities that brought us all together is one significant bond that can't be discourage by anyone.

This get together moved a lot of gap and misses over some period of time. From this point perhaps we will continue to live and occassionally catch up. I love this union, this brotherhood. It is certainly one thing that I will not trade for any wealth at the most. Truly this is an amazing kindred of heart, ideas, strength and support with a breeze of fun, happy moments and touch of life's reality.

I honor thee my brothers on this section of my so-called life.

For my brethren and companions' sakes I will say, Peace be within thee (Ps. 122:8).

Four years of friendship to last forever

We call ourselves FAB 4 and we're proud to be one! I met these beautiful women four years back in my life's so-called journey. It wasn't an just an ordinary spark of friendship, it was a promising relationship that proved to be one of my best group ever.

At high level, our group started at the Nipa Hut Grill (NHG) in Ortigas after a long day and hard stressful day these fab four had the first chance to get to know better and we clicked! Astrologically speaking: 2 Gemineans (boy and girl), 1 Leo (girl) and 1 Sagitarrian (1 girl) these are proven compatible force in the zodiac. I guess from that view we really hit it big time.

Our journey together started, through all the work worries, career plans, love lives, sex lives up to the most serious topics that we could think of. I looked back now and I can't help but be sentimental of our journey.

In the four years I've met these lady of class, elegance and intelligence I must say if I were really straight I could make them fall in love for me. I do! With them I've become more at ease and comfortable. They were my girlfriends, real partners in crime and in the lightest flick of our fingers we do magic.

Now, it's 2008 and we're still stronger and we never forget to seek each other's comfort and confidence. I guess, in times of happiness and sadness we have become stronger together. Say now, Shindie is enjoying her married life and soon motherhood. Excell, is on her way to the achieving of her 2 year plan, 5 year plan and 10 year plan (to build an empire) and Pinky who is now braving the challenge to work abroad (go girl! you deserve it!). And so what's left of me, hmmm I am still here enjoying some sort of stability in my career, financial (although really challenging), and family. No lovelife still but who cares when you've got some friends that never really forget!

Last night probably is one of our best get together among the other gimmicks, events that we've joined as one. And from last night, maybe it will take months after we get together again but it's worth the wait!

So much for Fab Four, I need to go to the gym for now. Later tonight, I will have another get together to join with my other group. :-)

Reading blogs

Reading is perhaps one of the most enriching actions any one can do. I must say, in reading I get entertained, learned a lot of new ideas and my creativity is ignited when I read something so descriptive and engaging.

Reading blog is one of the latest thing that I enjoy doing. I don't know why it is such a blessing to read other people's idea and thoughts pattern. Whether it is just simple expressions, reviews, experiences and simple wild outburst of emotion from a blogger, I enjoy it!

I wonder now, whether some of my readers enjoy my own write ups here and on some of my other online blogs. I hope they share the same experience of enjoyment as they read my stories.

Now, I'm ready to close my eyes. :-)

Weddings are special - reposted blog

A wedding is a ceremony that celebrates the beginning of a marriage or civil union. Wedding traditions and customs vary greatly between cultures, ethnic groups, religions, countries, and social classes. In some countries, cultures and religions, the actual act of marriage begins during the wedding ceremony. In others, the legal act of marriage occurs at the time of signing a marriage license or other legal document, and the wedding is then an opportunity to perform a traditional ceremony and celebrate with friends and family. A woman being married is called a bride, a man called a bridegroom, after the ceremony they become a wife and a husband, respectively.

Source: Wikipedia website

I have been attending weddings ever since I was a child. I am inspired to write about weddings today. Lately, I have been thinking about settling down. But to no avail, I know it's not going to happen. At least because that is what I want. I am not the marrying type of guy, who aside from my preference sees no point of having to marry any one. Will I continue to feel this way? I have yet to see.

Pressures from your kinsmen, friends and society sometimes lead someone to find someone to marry. A person marries by his own will, as part of his religion, and of course by virtue of the power of Love. Wikipedia had its own definition as I showed above this blog.

In my lifetime, I think I have attended like 10 wedding ceremonies: Aunt Tina's wedding, Aunt Meynee's wedding, Kuya Arnel's wedding, Diko's wedding, Sangko's wedding, Rochie's wedding, Weng's wedding, Mae's wedding, Yuri's wedding, Shindie's wedding and just recently Sharon's wedding. All these weddings have one thing in common, it's warm.

When I was younger, I had my own share to become a ring bearer. Then I grew older and had my share to become a secondary sponsor. At some point, I was part of the simple rites of offertory.

The march of the wedding entourage is something that's always been anticipated by everyone. This is where the tears and excitement are starting to mount. I remember this is one of the best part of the wedding.

After the church ceremony, we go to reception where we celebrate the newly weds. Aside from the food, we look forward to seeing the program, the traditional wedding cutting of the cake, wine ceremony, doves, garter and bouquet.

Weddings, bonds, love, commitment or whatever anyone may call it, it's really something. Even in the older times, we regarded weddings so highly. Even gays engage into weddings, nuptials, 2 become 1 sessions with their promises of love.

I love weddings. After Sharon's wedding, I was thinking how many wedding ceremonies will I still attend. Maybe more weddings and I will truly be honored to be part of the wedding rites, ceremony and celebration.

Happy. Dreamy. Just attended wedding. So warm. Inspiring. :-)

Multiply

So I have joined the bandwagon. I have initiated my Multiply account. I just want to let everyone know that it's now activated and as an official initial offering I have featured my Iwriteagain Blog in here with my latest posting about my Sagada trip.

Banaue - Sagada Trip na Trip - January 2008

When I was younger, I would always look at the postcards I see in National Bookstore selling Banaue Rice Terraces photos and Sagada caves. Now, it's not just postcards that I saw. I am really happy to embarked on a spontaneous journey to Banaue and Sagada, Mt. Province.

It was a quick plan with two good friends of mine. They mentioned that they wanted to repeat the kind of trip that we did last 2006 to Mt. Pulag. So we all agreed to reach Sagada and do the adventure caving and hiking. The side trip in Banaue is also a blissful experience.

On to Banaue - January 4, 2008
We decided to take the Banaue - Bontoc - Sagada route in order to reach Sagada. In doing so, we took the bus trip via Victory Liner in Kamuning at 10:45 PM towards Banaue. It's a 9-hour drive which had 2 or 3 stop overs in Bulacan, Nueva Vizcaya and Lagawe. The trip is quite long and really tiring. Nonetheless, we arrived at Banaue around 7 AM. On our way up, you can feel the cold chill inside the bus so you'll know that you're up and far away from the city.

BANAUE - January 5, 2008 Arrival

First impression of Banaue (town proper), was a bit old I thought. It's a small town with lots of local people. We saw some group of tourists as well going to Sagada and some are planning to do their adventure trip in Banaue first.


Banaue is famous for the world-renowned rice terraces built by our forefathers. It was an amazing feat for men to build rice plantation alongside the sturdy and fierce mountains of Cordillera. The rice terraces in Banaue were recognized by UNESCO as heritage site. In Banaue, you will have to visit all of the main points there is to see.

Since Banaue is not our main destination, we just contented ourselves with the view of the viewpoint #7 where you could see the rice terraces. It's one of our side trip on our way to Sagada.


TIP: Going to Sagada, local jeep trip to Bontoc leaves daily at 8:30 AM and then from Bontoc you take another jeep ride to Sagada. Be aware that sometimes when jeeps are all full in capacity you might have to rent the next jeep. According to the locals, only one jeepney trip goes to Bontoc from Banaue. So you really have to make it there in Banaue by 8 AM.

The Mt. Polis - View of amazing Cordillera mountains
So, it's given that our group had to rent the jeep for Php 2,500.00 'cause we were left behind by the local jeep. The only good side to renting the jeep is that we had stop overs which took us to different points along the way to Sagada. First stop was the VIEW POINT # 7 and then second stop is the MT. POLIS view.

I don't actually know why it's called Mt. Polis. Nonetheless, it's quite thrilling to see the mountains of Cordillera. The green view, the astounding sunlight striking the misty clouds.

On this stop over, we had the chance to take some photos with the large statue of the Virgin Mary erected in the Mt Polis vicinity. We even had the chance to see some vegetable plantation terrain.


Bay Yo Rice and Vegetable Terraces


Third stop on our way to Sagada was the Bay Yo village. It had an amazing view of the village and the rice terraces along the side as well as the vegetable plantation.

Going down further the slope, you can see the wild river cutting through the mountains. It's really amazing to note that in these vast array of mountain ranges you will find villages sprawling. These are like hidden civilizations that are far from the spoils of the urban jungle.

Bontoc - town proper
It's getting late in the afternoon when we passed by Bontoc town proper. From this point, it will be another 1 hour before we reach Sagada proper.


Bontoc is a small town, complete with the basic elements of a progressive community. I saw life and progress taking place in that area. I saw beautiful concrete houses in the middle of the rice fields which led me to think that the people of Bontoc are not mere ordinary locals. They have something to brag and to be proud of. They were vibrant, fresh looking and you'll be surprise that they know how to converse in English. Well, this is the same with the rest of the locals in Banaue and Sagada.

As we go out of the town proper, we passed by Bontoc Rice Terraces which is so fresh and green. It's one of the good view of Bontoc where you will see the wild river running down the slopes of the mountain nourishing Bontoc and it's people.


SAGADA - Final destination
After a long hour of drive and stop overs, we reached Sagada around 1 PM on January 5, 2008. The road trip was tiring so we asked the jeep to take us to Rock Inn and Cafe where we checked in. It's a place far from the town proper where you had an amazing view of the mountain mist, orange orchard and cool feeling of the wind blowing peacefully.


My friends and I are quite tired so we freshened up and draw our itenerary from that point. We decided to just refresh, then hike towards the town. By 3 PM in the afternoon, we were hiking towards the town proper in anticipation of seeing the town first hand.


Along the way to the town we passed by houses and inns. We also passed by Masferre's Photograph museum. We also passed by Sagada Weaving house. After 30 - 40 minutes of hiking we reached the town. We first looked for the Tourist Information Center in order to inquire about the places we can visit. We also had to register in the tourist center. We paid Php 10.00 each for the registration. In the tourist center, we were greeted warmly enough and we inquired. From there, any tourist of Sagada can get a great deal of information to help them go around the places. There is a map being sold for Php 25.00 that will show you the places you can visit. Also, the tourist center has the information to help you get tour guides and transportation.

Our first day in Sagada is coming to an end. By 6 PM, it starts to get even colder. Our group, decided to just inquire more on some accommodation 'cause we decided to transfer from Rock Inn to the town proper on the second day. After inquiring, we went to Log Cabin, one of the famous eating places recommended by a friend. Every Saturday, with advance reservation, they have French Buffet which is only costing around Php 300.00. We were unfortunate 'cause at that time the reservation is already full. So what we did is reserve for Sunday dinner preparation but this time it's no longer buffet.

Our group ended eating in Masferre Cafe and Restaurant. The food was good tasting. It was freshly prepared especially the salad and vegetable meals. We had dessert at the famouse Yogurt House later that evening.

It was getting late so, we headed back to Rock Inn to turn the leaf for the day. On our day 2, we have lots of things to do.

SAGADA - Morning Hike From Rock Inn - January 6, 2008
The morning in Sagada is indeed a chill. I could remember that at the earliest morning hours I woke up with headached due to cold temperature. It was 6 AM when our group got up and headed for some hiking experience.

Hiking is one of the to do things in Sagada. If you have lots of hiking experience, you'll love it there in Sagada. In the first hour of the day, our group warmed up by strolling around the Rock Inn vicinity. The place is far from the town proper. It has a big space, orange orchard, and quite far from the main road. The inn is an ideal place for short term hiker.

After our group had initial hike, my friend RJ and I earlier planned to hike and discover the famous Bokong Falls.

Bokong Falls - "Small Falls"

From Rock Inn, we hike for around 20-30 minutes. Good thing that the inn is near the vicinity of the fall. Since it's morning and the temperature is quite cold, it was a very good hiking time. Literally, our bodies warmed and sweat so we had to open our jackets to make the sweat evaporate.

After some minutes of phase walking, we reached the falls. The way to Bokong Fall is not that hard. You'll pass by a small road on your way there. And then on a small wooden gate there's a trail that leads to the fall. On your way to Bokong Falls you'll hear the water rush and you have a good view of the nearby rice field. It's truly awe-inspiring.

We reached Bokong fall and took pictures. I even had the chance to play in the cold water. It's blood rushing and exciting.

We headed back to the inn and had our sumptuous mountain breakfast. We checked out of Rock Inn and planned to move to the town proper. We transfered to Sagada Resthouse which is nearer the tourist center where we would need to get our tour guide and transportation to take us to our next destination.


Two Burial Caves and Sumaging Cave - January 6, 2008
It was around 10 AM, we headed to the tourist center and ask for assistance to take us to Sumaging Cave. In the tourist center, any tourist would find help and information. It's quite easy. The locals know how to converse in English so it's easier for them to talk and explain everything.


We left the town proper and headed to the Sumaging Cave. But before we read Sumaging, we had two stop overs. Two burial caves that local tribes used to use during the early times.


We also passed by Sagada Rice Terraces. During this time of the year, the rice terraces is not so aesthetically appealing. It's not yet planting season so it's not all green. Nonetheless, it's quite nice to see the beautiful rice terraces of Sagada.

The road to Sumaging cave is about 20 minutes drive from the town proper. Alas! we reach Sumaging Cave point.

Sumaging Cave adventure


Inside the cave you will see interesting cave patterns. At the first portion of the cave it's not so interesting but there's a pungy smell in the air due to the shit drops of the bats inside the cave.

You have to wear mojo sandals or good shoes to protect your feet. But at a point, you will have to take off your footwear because you will have to get wet as you go futher down the cave.


There are so many interesting rock formations inside the cave. They were formed several years ago and it continues to grow as the age goes on.

At the middle portion of our spelunking we started to hear the water rush and true enough we witnessed clear water rushing down. At the end of the cave road, we are experiencing cold water.

The Sumaging cave is indeed one of the best cave I ever had the chance to go inside in.


SAGADA TRIP ETCETERA

We had our last few adventures in Sagada after Sumaging. There's the famous lemon pie. Also, the ever famous food of Log Cabin. Too bad, we didn't had the chance to partake in the French buffet they offer every Saturday night. But then again, Sunday Log Cabin dinner is one of the best served dinner I ever tasted.


There are so many other interesting points in Sagada. We need to go back here and continue the adventure. Soon!


SAGADA going back to MANILA
On your way back to Manila, you can opt to take two routes: SAGADA - BONTOC - BANAUE - MANILA or SAGADA - BAGUIO - MANILA.

It will be up to you which route. Either way you will enjoy the experience. Happy trip!

WHICH HARRY POTTER CHARACTER AM I?

	You are part Harry. You're a loyal and courageous friend. You'd do anything to protect the people you love, especially if it'll get you a break from class for a little while.
	You are part Hermione. You're a bookworm always in search of answers. When pressed, however, you can always be counted on to put away the books and help your friends.
Find Your Character @ BrainFall.com

WHAT KIND OF GUY WILL YOU FALL FOR?

What Kind of Guy Will You Fall For?
	You would fall for the geek. If you're looking for love, consider spending a little more time studying up in the library. To you, there's nothing more attractive than intelligence, shyness, and kindness; your future love may have four eyes and zero social skills, but he'll make up for it in brains and heart.
Find Your Character @ BrainFall.com

MY HEROES' PERSONALITY TEST

Your Score: Simone Deveaux

You scored 50 Idealism, 50 Nonconformity, 33 Nerdiness

You think you can paint the future. Fine, paint one without me.Congratulations, you're Simone Deveaux! You are a loving, dedicated person with a variety of creative interests. You may however, fall in love a little too easily. Your best quality: You are a romantic Your worst quality: You are a romantic

Link: The Heroes Personality Test written by freedomdegrees on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

So I write again

I write again.

Here I am, sitting in front of my desk. I had an itched to visit my old blog here and was amazed of the many pieces I've excreted from my juicy brain.

For quite sometime now, I have not been posting some thoughts here on this address. I've managed to maintain some of my thoughts through the other address I have in Friendster.

While I've had so many links created on this site, I opted to revive my link here and set another Blog.

I write again as I would like to call my new blog. I write again for it is my first love. It's not that I stopped writing, but only because I just wanted to lie low a bit. But like any good writer, I did not stop writing.

The world is wonderful and life is so big not to write about it. So I chose to write again.

INDEPENDENCE DAY SPECIAL: Confuse Filipino

PGMA and her allies are in big big trouble lately. So what is new? The Filipinos are always hounded by political instability and turmoil. Since the time when the 2nd World War, this country is always in the running field but it never came to a point that it reach some point of progress.

Back then, the world was recovering and so the Philippines is like one of the best countries. As they said, we were more advanced than our neighboring countries before. The effect of American colonization on this country has certainly affected the lives of many people. Good and bad, the American presence to this country was something...

Philippine Independence day is just a couple of days away. Looking back and being a Filipino, I am in such big question why this country never really made it big in the world in terms of economic stability & political maturity.

So many ideas are lurking inside my head as to why and what is the reason behind Philippines rise and fall so to speak. Filipinos as they said lack the discipline, they have strong regionalism, overly religious belief, high streak crab mentality and ever rising brain drain are some of the obvious answers that I could think of.

I am in big trouble perhaps because as part of this country, I am not in a secure situation. I am not fully enjoying the good life, the good society, the progress.

If we will only learn. Well, that is what I can say. Many of us are always complaining and trying to destroy the reputation of somebody just to grab power and success. That is one Filipino behavior that has been with us for so many years now. Sad to say and as truth really hurts, this behavior kept us hanging on the drain hole.

Moving forward, I must say I am not a good citizen of this country. Why? Because like most people, I complain, I don't feel the sense of nationalism that most advocate of nationalism would feel. I am not very supportive of the government for I have always put a negative connotation to its governance.

Oh well, as of this writing I cannot think of something good to end this expression....my mind is in limbo and so many thoughts are coming inside my head. Mixed expressions and thoughts about my beloved Philippines....

In short, maybe like most Filipinos, I am confuse and I do not know what direction I should take to live my life as Filipino citizen. At the same time, I am dissatisfied with what my life has turned out to be in my country, like how the Philippine economy had been going through UPS and DOWNS. So much for this...

With that, I can only, "Mabuhay pa din ang Pilipinas! Kasihan nawa tayo ng pagpapala ng Diyos at Kanyang pagmamahal."

SERYENG TAGALOG : Kay Haiku730

Liwanag sa aking madilim na pananaw
Magiting na kabalyero ng aking buhay
Isang makisig na kasama
Tunay na sa akin ikaw ay mahalaga Mahal kita...

Tanglaw sa aking landas
Isang lakas na bumubuo sa aking nanghihinang diwa
Masarap kasama, mainit at nag-alab
Tunay na sa akin ikaw ay mahalaga Mahal kita...

Walang sinuman ang aangkin sa iyo sa akin
Labis na ako sa iyo'y nahumaling
Tapat kitang iibigin, iyong kalinga'y aking nanamnamin
Tunay na sa akin ikaw ay mahalaga Mahal kita...aking sinta!

SERYENG TAGALOG (Tuloy-tuloy lang) : Sa isang sulok ng asul na hinaing

Nais kong mabuhay kasama kayong lahat sa isang kahariang walang sakit at lumbay. Nitong mga huling araw ako ay dumadaan sa isang kritikal na pagkakataon. Muli ako ay sinusumpong ng takot, ng pangamba at pangungulila.

Ako'y waring isang nawawalang kuting na natatakot sa kung anong kahihinatnan ng lahat ng mga nangyayari sa akin nitong mga huling araw. Sa katunayan nga lang, hinde naman ako nababahala ng lubos na ako'y mawawalan ng trabaho sa susunod na mga araw ngunit ako ay nag-iisip kung anong maganda kong gawin upang ibsan ang napipintong tagtuyot sa aking buhay karera.

Ako'y tila isang inakay na nangangambang di na ako datnan ng aking ina sa aking pugad dahil baka ako'y kainin na ng kalaban. Sa katunayan ang aking pangamba kahit paano ay nagpipilit humulagpos sa aking katauhan. Sari-saring paraan ng pagsasaya ang aking ginagawa para lamang kahit paano ay maging maayos ang pagtingin ko sa lahat ng ito. Hindi ko naman ito tinatakasan pero nais kong maging balanse at normal lang itong aking buhay sa kabila ng lahat.

Ako'y tila isang babae na naghihintay sa pagbabalik o pagdating ng aking minamahal. Ilang buwan na ng lumisan sa aking piling ang isang mahalagang tao sa aking buhay pag-ibig. Mula noon di na ako naging normal. Hinahanap ko ata ang katangian niya sa ibang mga nakikilala ko sa aking paglabas at pagbisita sa internet. Ewan ko ba, sadyang alam ko ngayon na ako'y nabulid sa kanya at kung kaya sa pagkakataong ito hinde ko na din nakikitang masaya ako sa pagpunta punta ko sa mga bahay aliwan o sayawan kung saan ko maaaring makilala si ginoo ng aking buhay.

Ang internet sa ngayon ang siyang nagbibigay daan upang makausap ko ang aking Marso at siya'y makapiling subalit hinde ito kasiguruhan para sa amin. Kaalinsabay nito ang pagdating ng mga ibang buwan ng kakisigan na aking nakakausap at nakakakilala ng personal. Kung minsan naisip ko ayos lang makipag-usap at makipagkilala sa ganitong paraan pero hinde din pala lalo na't nagkita na kayo at lahat ng hinahanap mo o hinahanap niya ay di nagtugma sa gusto niyo. Ito'y nagiging isang kabaliwan at kabalintunaan na lamang. Masakit din minsan kasi nararamdaman mong ito na sana pero hinde pa pala. Siya na sana pero hinde naman nagtatagal at nawawala din.
Pangungulila at paghahanap ng sandigan at kakapitan ang aking nais na maayos sa susunod na araw. Pagod na ako, masasabi kong ako'y sobrang pagod. Nais kong lumigaya ngunit di sa paraang sandali lamang ang dulot o hatid na pakiramdam.

Sana sa isang sulok na asul, masabi ko din na di lang hinaing ito kundi kasiyahang kwento din minsan pa ang aking maibahagi sa inyong lahat...

JT

Out of the blue expression: Sleepless Night

I was gasping and basically in the restless mood last night. I enjoyed a good dinner, farewell party for a Malaysian friend. It was a good night, fun and delightful at some point. We all headed for home before midnight strikes.

At last, at home, I get to enjoy the warm bed on a warm humid night. I slept for almost 3 hours and suddenly I saw myself in pain, in an uncomfortable feeling, in a very confuse state. Dreaming or for real? This is the question that I asked myself. It was like I am awake but also asleep. It was like, I am lying down but also up.

Finally, I stood up and it was like a relief. A freedom that I desire from the sleepless night that I am experiencing. I am very tired. I am at the same time reflective of the situation that I just saw. I saw what I cannot really describe and devour. I am in confusion maybe. My brain has been processing a lot of thoughts lately and perhaps last night it all burst out.

I've had been in many sleepless nights in the past, but last night I felt it was such an extra sleepless night. In 7 months, I have always been very comfortable with my situation. Maybe the changes that I am about to encounter soon is making me look back and think much.

Sleepless night...

Out of the blue expressions: Long Weekend Aftermath

I am blessed to live my life this past four days. YES! Why?!

I spent the long weekend mostly with my family. We had a reunion so to speak and turned out to be a spontaneous effort to go out of town all of a sudden. These kind of things seldom happen due to our busy skeds and separate lives. But this long weekend experience is something worth writing right now.

I am perhaps looking for the strength and support that I can master from my kinsmen. I am losing my grip and my told these past days as I enter a new career crossroad which is also being hit with occassional love worries. The long weekend gave me enough time to reflect and think of what I must do with my life once again. A new level of awareness that I need to shuffle within my energy field so that I won't lose my track was ignited. My time with my family helped me a lot.

On the other side, I will be honest to say that the long weekend was also quite a bore, come to think of it. I missed my chances in going out with my friends and party. I opted to be on the side for these past 4 days so I paid for it. For a while, I detached my self from the scene thinking I may get something new out of family "thingy" experience. There was no regret to a minute that I was with them. It was a pleasant , simple experience and well grounded.

I am thinking now. I am wishing that after this storm, I will be able to decide clearly on my next move. I wish I will be stronger and more secure. I wish I will be able to find the love and career/company that is right for me. I wish I won't ever have to argue with my tatay again in terms of planning my life. I wish I won't have to succumb to the pressure of others just to have a good life. I really wish my life will be better and better each day with less pain and more happiness.

Light footed elf

I told my elf, "ang tagal ng araw ng pagsasara .. gusto ko ng mamahinga..at makapag-isip ng tama sa mga susunod na araw... i am afraid to decide on things right now..lahat ng aspeto.. alam mo dahil dun puro pagsasaya lang nasa isip ko..puro mga panandalian pag aaliw na kumakain sa purchasing power ng bulsa ko ... bad side and good side of everything..hay!"

My elf, my confidant..and sometimes I'm her confidant. Well, it's seldom in life that we find a good natured person to talk to, to laugh with, to chat with and to hold on. This elf, light-footed elf is one great person to know.

She is vulnerable at times, quiet but with a great deal of substance that everyone may appreciate if they only know how.

Too bad, we're not "talo" haha she's a sister to me! She's a hag that any guy of my style can ask for more. Thanks for your endless words of wisdom. Truth hurts and it really hurts to hear most of your sermons about life, maybe because you have experienced more of life than I am since your the eldest of our fabolous quartet!

Oh well, this is the good side of having to lose a job soon and having to do less work while in the office as I await the last day of this warm, yet cold office. I get to look at my other correspondence which I find less time dealing with when I was busy at work.

"When things are in their best shape, we tend to forget the most important factors in our life that truly make us whole."

Out of the blue expression: The release

Finally, am free of another bondage. Yes! It's official my current office is closing down. No! Am not in total celebration thinking that I am gonna lose my source of income, this isn't going to be very easy especially if I don't find a suitable replacement soon.

My career path has always been so derailed. I am not sure why I have not been so lucky finding my near to ideal, perfect company. I enjoy what I do as an IT professional but I have not been in good fortune to find the stable, secure and inspiring office that I seek.

As this chapter of my career comes to an end, I am in bliss to think that I still learned a lot from this recent experience. I met new friends and certainly I would like to keep them in the long run. In every company that I was with in the past 5 years, if there's one good thing in these experiences, it would be the skills that I learned and the friends that I earned. Nobody can take these and them away from me.

Now, I am moving forward. I am happy, 'coz, I am relieved from the pressure of work. I am sad, 'coz I am going to start all over again. But this is life for me, an endless pursuit and challenge. I always feel battered but then I also feel blessed. This is my life. This is how it has been. I am glad that I live, got no regrets but moments of sentiments at times. But this is my life, my ever colorful life.

Cheers for me! Kudos..Praise! God bless me on my journey! So mote it be!

Out of the blue expression..again!

Tuesday...Choose your day!

Just here in my office, trying to figure out a way to let myself go out of boredom. I practically woke up on a bad day light. My head aches and it really slowed me in the process.

As I write and make my self productive, my mind seem to float and wonder on a dreamy mood. So much so that I am sleepy here, I found my self contemplating on the issues of career and love life. YEAH! Can you believe that? I have a career and a not so good love life which I am so eager to resolve but I don't know how.

So much for that reflection...YAY! I am really bored, sleepy, feeliing tired and lazy. I hope the day at work ends now. I just wanna linger around and not concentrate much on work.

Out of the blue expression

It's another ordinary Monday! I spent my time, my day in the office and practically did not do anything much. In any case, I had the whole morning 'til lunch today outside of the office.
One good thing perhaps is that when I arrive at the office there's less work to do. Heheheh
From time to time it is quite nice to be bum in the office.

Later today I spent my day on the net. And by break of the evening, I managed to snatched 2 free tickets for the advance screening of Closer at the Powerplant. So cool and quite engaging this evening for me. I spent it all alone. The friends I invited to join me see the movie are all not available.

I loved Closer, it reminded of my creativity as a writer. The writer of the story inspired me to do something like that in the future. A new friend, recommended that the movie is quite good and he did not fail me. Salute to him!

I am tired and bored now... practically wasting my spirit here in front of the sad monitor. I am also sad and out of the blue my expression series is back officially!

Good evening!

Resurrection is the name of the game

HAPPY EASTER?

I am blessed to have experienced another Holyweek special. This year it was not the usual celebration.

I commemorated this occassion in the company of my family, friends and later by myself.
What is more striking about this is the fact that I, right now have been undergoing a lot questions in my life once again. Personal life and career life has always been on top of my concern. Sometimes I worry too much to a point that I am overwhelmed. This is probably not good 'cause I tend to break down.

This lenten season proved to be different from the past lenten celebration. This came in parallel with the commemoration of my lola's death anniversary as well as my mom's. It is really a time of change. I know it's been 2 years when both of the two special women in my life passed away. Their influence and memory on me still lingers on up to this very moment. This is a good thing 'cause I keep myself on the ground. So this season of holiness did not only led me to observe kindness but also it gave me time to think about them, my mom and my lola. I missed them and that is why I felt a bit sad during the last two days of this holy week commemoration.

Happy Easter! New life, new hope that symbolizes the sacrifice and the love of Jesus for mankind. I certainly have no reason to fret because this past week is a good week. Changes took place and it is not really easy but I have to bear the time's command over it.

I do hope once again, after these days of reflection, merritorious moments and meditative contemplation I will be able to soar high and focus on my goals and be the best of what I can be.

I am resurrected!

An expression of love and hope : 3 weeks love affair

3 Weeks Love Affair

I never imagined in my life that someone will come and go just that so easily. The hardest part of course is letting go and moving on.

At first the act was just like a play and flirtation but this turned out to be something more than I expected. We clicked and we find instant connection in our first meeting. Literally, we jived and everything fell into its proper place. I guess at some point both of us love the idea of being together and be with each other's arms. The sincerity and the care for each other I felt in and out.

I am thankful to the Creator for this. I am not bitter that this romantic connection just ended like this with no proper confirmation.

It's quite not easy to have a long distance love affair. This is the reason I did not entertain much the thought of us being partners. I am happy and glad to share my piece and my thoughts. I felt special in many ways as well. It is such a thrill and something unexpected. I have not experience this kind of treatment from anyone in long while.

Indeed, this short romantic flick was a blessing. Indeed a big motivation for me to dream more and achieve more.

In all these good sides, there's just some part of me that felt I am once again all alone. Alone in a sense that I am on my own, no partner, no instant inspiration, no instant companion who will like me and love me as I am . Once again, I am dreaming that someday the right person will come along and will never leave my sight again.


....the promise,
I love you and I need you, if it is our destiny to be together it will happen I suppose. I will try hard to do my best and follow you there. I hope by that time, I am not so late to have you back in my arms again.