Out of the blue expression: 25 years and 10 days later...

Each year that we grow older and wiser is something worth celebrating.



Before I turned 25, I am such a lost soul. (..oh well, that’s how I thought I am… There were lots of things I need to resolve and accept.



When I come to that point of realizing everything, I readily accepted all those things I thought important. In doing so, I gave high hope for me to start all over again. I actually believed that I am going to be much stronger and wiser. All these were true to a point but it was not all worth it and it proved to be so hard to sustain.



When I celebrated my 25th year, I was battling more issues never before raised in front of me. It was such a quick phase and an abrupt pattern that I realize I am only raising up the level of weariness inside me. Life at any give time is almost the same and it was always ready to give you the best and the worst of things.



25 years and 10 days later, I am older. I grew bigger. I transcended higher. And at the same time, I felt am falling behind. I am still attached and have not fully understood the meaning. So many questions were answered but then a couple of issues remain to be answered.



In accepting the truth about me, there was a sense of fulfillment. In facing my enemies and dealing with them, there was a moment of victory. In caring for others, I felt love grow within me. In serving good for others and finding new allies, I am filled with high spirits. All these happenings were not enough for me to get rid of the other side of life I once was trying to forget. I felt rushed, alone, uncertain, afraid and lost still. I have not faced the big picture.



25 years and 10 days later I evolved but I also have not change. Changes don't come in physical form it should also be in varied aspects of mentality, emotion and spirituality. I realized that I have not fulfilled those other aspects.



A good friend of mine once said to me that she admires my maturity and deep thinking ability. It is such an inspiring thing to hear. Knowing that I am still a lad who must learn, achieve and succeed in all the aspects of life itself, this I believe is in preparation of my eternity.



25 years and 10 days later, here I am sitting, contemplating and composing this out of the blue expression. I am just hoping that after this I am going to feel better and a lot stronger again.